"THE TALK"

“Soul Ties Recap”

Week 1:

-Your value comes from God, not your partner.

Week 2:

-You can only experience oneness with others, once you’ve experienced it with God and yourself.

“The Talk”

-Tonight we are going to have, “the talk”.

-But first I want to tell you a story that WRECKED my perspective on this topic in the best way possible.

*Story about Lem asking throw away question that turned into my capstone project*

I think asking the questions, “what is sex?” and “how do we honor God with our sexuality before we are married?” are extremely important.

Because we can never expect to have a proper value system around something that is undefined in our lives.

What is sex?

Let me first tell you what sex isn’t. It’s not the mingling of souls with two humans becoming one.The physical act of sex is not the mingling of souls. It’s not a beautiful union before God where two become one.

Sex is a physical act of passion God created for the expression of love and intimate connection of two people. However, sadly, when you have sex you don’t always have love and you don’t always have intimacy.

Intimacy is the vehicle God gave us to form connection with others.

Genesis 2:18–25 ESV

18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” 19 Now out of the ground the Lord God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. 20 The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. 21 So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22 And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.

We were made for connection by God. God created us and saw that it wasn’t good for us to live in isolation so He created a partner for us to journey through life with. However, he never intended for us to have a wrapped view of intimacy and connection.

How do we honor God with our sexuality?

Let me tell you one lie you’ve been told. Honoring God with your sexuality isn’t simply waiting until marriage to have sex.

Let me tell you my story and how I have best answered that in my life.

*Share my full story*

-Porn at 2nd grade (intro of shame into my life)

-Started exploring what I had seen with friends and was taken advantage of by one. (Shame intensified and became the dominating emotion around my sexuality)

-My sexuality became a secret I hid from everyone and tried to pretend didn't exist.

-In college it finally got to the point where I began using girls to get my fix because porn wasn’t enough.

-I was constantly looking and searching for the best advice or software to keep me in line with my desired boundaries.

Then one day I was invited on a journey of understanding the why behind my actions and everything SLOWLY changed.

*Share my story of redemption with Flood and healing through counseling*

I had to be brought out of my shame to be able to find my true battle ground.

Ephesians 6:10–12 NIV

10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

The enemy wants you to believe that the physical act of sex is the end all be all of God’s plan for our sexuality. he wants the narrative of your sexuality to be full of shame.

Why should you care about God’s plan for your sexuality?

John 3:30 NIV

30 He must become greater; I must become less.”

At a certain point your faith has to inform your function.

We’ve been in a series about love, relationships, and sex and I bet you didn’t think the majority of the series would be spent in Genesis.

Faith is the belief in something unseen or the not yet. Faith is the belief that hope will triumph and goodness will reign in the end.

The process of having a healthy view and understanding of love, relationships, and sex begins with having a healthy view of God.

God loves us, created us to have a relationship with Him, and He wants only good for us.

The word of God that challenges a way of life you may have is never meant to control or condemn you but to bring you freedom and health.